


Lingering Rain

by CalamityK



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Boys In Love, Getting Back Together, Getting Together, Kissing, M/M, Metaphors, Past Relationship(s), Rain, Zine piece
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-29
Updated: 2018-10-29
Packaged: 2019-08-09 10:50:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16448483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CalamityK/pseuds/CalamityK
Summary: JJ arrives, dripping and unannounced, on Otabek’s doorstep during the off-season, along with Almaty’s first bout of summer storms.





	Lingering Rain

**Author's Note:**

> jkskjhskjsjks.....i can finally post this.
> 
> its my first JJBek piece and it's also my piece for the [YOI Rare Pair Zine](https://yoirarepairzine.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Turns out I like JJ and Otabek in this context...

The summer Otabek met JJ was a season of igniting rain, a weave of something delicate and impossible. 

 

They fell together as easily as they fell apart. The time in between filled with the balancing of their feet on ice and their hands on each other.

 

Four years later, Otabek finds that the memories still ache.

 

-»¦«-

 

JJ arrives, dripping and unannounced, on Otabek’s doorstep during the off-season, along with Almaty’s first bout of summer storms. 

 

His clothes are too thick for the weather, and his black hair is longer than Otabek remembers; heavy with water and sticking to his forehead in unfamiliar patterns. Otabek feels a bit like he’s viewing a stranger—and a part of him thinks that he  _ is _ , it’s been that long—but the teeth; a straight, lily-white line beaming between parted pink lips taunts him. JJ’s smile is still JJ’s smile,  _ even if it’s fake _ .

 

And Otabek knows it’s fake, because he can see the way the upturned corners war with the liquid falling from JJ’s eyes that look  _ nothing _ like the rain outside. 

 

A question forms immediately on his tongue, but he doesn’t ask it, doesn’t even say hello, just sidesteps and beckons JJ and his suitcase indoors. 

 

When the door closes, and Otabek becomes all too aware of the rain that blew in on his own cheeks, JJ finally breaks the silence.

 

“I couldn’t think of anywhere else to go.” 

 

-»¦«-

 

Conversations stay stilted for the first three days, avoidances bouncing in and out of the air around them like radio static. Then JJ puts the words between them firmly one morning, aching and bitter like the mug of black coffee he’s poured from Otabek’s pot. 

 

“She left me.” 

 

Otabek reaches for his own drink, warm and inviting, and considers pretending he didn’t hear. 

“Yeah?”

 

“She said there was something about me that she just couldn’t put her finger on. Like I had  _ secrets,  _ and she was constantly trying to catch up to them.” 

 

The tone of JJ’s voice is flat, not too much meaning directed anywhere specific, but Otabek can  _ feel _ the steel-stare of blue eyes in his peripheral. 

 

He puts his tongue between his teeth, bites it briefly in thought, then speaks. 

 

“Everyone’s entitled to secrets, Jean. I’m sure she had a few of her own.” 

 

JJ wrinkles his nose as he sips his coffee.

 

“Yeah but that’s the difference, I guess. I didn’t care enough about catching up to hers.”

 

-»¦«-

 

As the days pass, things that once existed between them seem to form ghosts, and Otabek certainly feels haunted. His mother used to say that once you know something, it never truly goes away, but he never thought he would apply the sentiment to more than his routines or the keys of a piano. 

 

He will always vividly remember what his first Ina Bauer felt like, but there’s an unfairness in the memory of JJ’s tongue spanning the gap of years. 

 

The taste somehow lingers in the back of his throat, sticking sickly-sweet between his teeth, every time JJ reaches out a hand. 

 

Otabek knows what JJ is reaching for, but the space separating their chests still holds something so fragile and broken that he never quite lets the grip connect. It’s too soon, and he finds he’s still afraid of what might break if those fingers touch more than his sleeve.

 

It took long enough to heal the first time.

 

-»¦«-

 

The rain that rolled in with JJ’s presence lingers with him, and Otabek thinks Almaty has never been so wet.  Three weeks in, and the climate is starting to feel more like Kazakhstan's north, but JJ convinces him to get the bike out anyway.

 

“ _ Come on, Beks _ . I’d beg and say ‘for old time’s sake’ but you never let me near it in the first place. It’ll be  _ fun _ .”

 

_ It’ll be a stopgap solution to their problem of not-talking-enough _ , Otabek thinks; a ‘ _ something to do _ ’ while the sky is overcast but not crying. 

 

“I never let you near it because out of everyone I know, you were always the most likely to fall off. You’re only graceful on the ice, remember?” 

 

He adjusts his half-gloves and tosses JJ a helmet even as he speaks. JJ only needs one hand to catch it, the fluidity of the motion souring Otabek’s rhetorical question and forming a smirk on JJ’s mouth. 

 

“Well then, I promise to hold on _ tight. _ ” 

 

Otabek’s stomach somehow sinks and soars at the same time.

 

-»¦«-

 

Something shifts when they park a few miles outside the city and make a stand among the hills. Between them, and in the sky, there becomes an almost-undetectable crackling. Otabek finds his feet planted firmly on the ground like he’s bracing for lighting, and JJ’s hands planted firmly on his waist. 

 

Then the  _ shifting _ becomes a  _ happening _ , where several things take place in such quick succession that it’s almost a perfect simultaneity. 

 

JJ’s hands move slightly backward; a warm touch, up past the hem of Otabek’s jacket as he raises his own hands to the front of JJ’s borrowed t-shirt. The sky opens up; a light mist dotting their cheeks with staggeredly-spaced raindrops. JJ leans down. Otabek leans up. The sharp metal-string sounds of a guitar begin a harsh symphony somewhere in JJ’s back pocket. 

 

Just like that, the moment breaks as easily as it formed, and Otabek is forced to blink water from his eyes as the rain gets split-second heavier and JJ springs away to answer the ill-timed call. Otabek can still feel the heat-prints of JJ’s palms, but cannot savor them as he watches the other man’s face fall. 

 

He doesn’t need to hear JJ speak to know who is on the other line.

 

“ _ Izzy? _ ” 

 

JJ’s face gets angry at the same pace Otabek’s chest gets tight.

 

“It doesn’t matter where I went,” a loaded breath in, “ _ I’m fine! _ ” 

 

Everything around them is rapidly becoming soaked and Otabek tries to turn his focus to how bad driving back is going to feel, but JJ catches his gaze with his own. There’s a pleading there, in the blue, that asks Otabek not to turn around; begs him to stay right where he is even though he wants nothing more than the opposite. 

 

Otabek silently pleads right back, though he’s not sure what for.  _ For JJ to hang up maybe _ . For him to step right back to Otabek’s side and pick up where they left off. 

 

JJ’s mouth tightens further, and Otabek wishes he could hear the other side of the conversation through the rain;  _ wishes  _ he were brave enough to take the phone right out of JJ’s hand and hang up on Isabella himself. 

 

Then the next words out of JJ’s mouth yank him back from the thought. 

 

“I went happily back to my  _ secrets _ , Izzy. I think that’s all you need to know.”

 

He hangs up the phone with his gaze never leaving Otabek’s, and the air heats with more than the storm.

 

-»¦«-

 

Their clothes come off as soon as they close the door to Otabek’s apartment, because it's the sensible thing to do when they’re cold and damp and desperately in need of warming up.

 

They kiss for the same reason; the gaps between them finally closing without interruption, and the shaky uncertainty in Otabek’s gut losing the limbs it had grown years prior. He thinks that maybe falling apart should be as simple as falling together,  _ not _ the other way around, then he tangles his fingers in JJ’s hair.

 

The smooth glide of mouths colliding—teeth sparking against over-eager lips—causes the kind of static-friction that heats their bones too quickly, and then that heat turns into something else. Something that screams ‘ _ finally _ ’ and ‘ _ four years without you was too long _ ’ as loudly as the stumble of their footsteps down the hall. Any voice of doubt Otabek might have is silenced by JJ’s whispers of his name, and a grip that finally connects.

 

He knows all the hours before dawn can’t make up for lost time, but they make their best effort anyway, and the last thing Otabek hears as he falls asleep is ‘ _ I think I love you _ ’ whispered to the rhythm of rain.

  
  
  


-»¦«-

 

Otabek wakes up with the words still echoing in his head, and opens his eyes slowly to an empty bed and the view of JJ standing in front of the bedroom window. He’s wearing nothing but one of Otabek’s old t-shirts and a pair of socks, and he looks unfairly pretty with the pink hues of daylight breaking over him. It’s all Otabek can do to catch his breath when JJ notices he’s awake and turns around.

 

“I’m glad you’re finally up. I just got off the phone with my coaches.” 

 

JJ smiles as he says it, beaming again that ungodly, lily-white spread of teeth that’s almost blinding,  _ but certainly not fake _ . Otabek can tell by the way it reaches for the corners of his eyes.

 

“Yeah?” Otabek stretches up from under the covers, bare-chested and suddenly— _ unduly—  _ hopeful. 

 

“I might be able to negotiate for Almaty to be my home rink this season,” a pregnant pause, “and guess what else?” 

 

JJ half-steps to the bed, some brand new sparkle shifting behind his eyes.

 

“What?” Otabek barely breathes again, watching mesmerized as a patch of light dances across JJ’s warm features. 

 

JJ’s smile widens.

 

“I think the sun is finally coming out.” 

 

“ _ Oh? _ ” Otabek forms a smile of his own. “Well I hope it stays this time.” 

 

JJ lands on the mattress all at once, throwing the covers to the side and crawling under them, wrapping himself perfectly around Otabek.

 

“ _ This time _ ,” he breathes in a kiss against Otabek’s cheek, “I think it will.” 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed this...if you want something from me find me at [Kingotabek](http://kingotabek.tumblr.com/) ... or leave a comment lol


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